Mutiny, I say!

Mums are annoying, especially mine. She uses this false calming voice that patronises you into either a fit of frustration, or actually calms you. Usually it’s the first rather than the second. An example, if you will:

Me: Do you think I’ll be able to bring my inhaler on the plane with me to London?
Mum: I don’t know. Why are you looking at that right now, anyways? Shouldn’t you be doing homework?
Me: It was just a question! Can’t I ask questions?
Mum: Of course you can. But why aren’t you doing your homework?
Me: But maybe I didn’t understand what TSA said…
Mum: Why are you getting upset? I can hear your tone of voice.
Me: I was just asking a question!
Mum: Calm down, Kristin.
Me: Mum! I’m calm!
Mum: Doesn’t sound it. Why are you upset?
Me: Honestly, your calm tone of voice drives me crazy. I hate it when you use it! Stop patronising me!
Mum: Fine. This conversation is over. Goodnight.

Gah, she’s so touchy. That’s sort of what we said – I left out loads of stuff too. Argh. Makes me want to slap her.

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