Eat cookies, lose weight. Wait, what?

I just saw the most amazing commercial on MSNBC.  I was busy approving comments on my blog (I love comments!!!), and then I heard the, “Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?” song.  You know, we sang it in kindergarden.  I look up, and there’s a portly man who says, “I stole the cookies from the cookie jar!” with a picture of him 100 lbs heavier adjacent to his “svelte” figure.  These people lost like, 100 lbs in 6 months.  That can’t be good for you.  Apparently these cookies replace your breakfast and lunch, and there’s no mention of how much they are.  But man, cookies for meals?  Didn’t mum say that was a big no no?

“Eat cookies, lose weight!”

Hell yes, if they’re Mint Milanos.  (Picture thieved from the Pepperidge Farms website… sorry!)  But sadly enough, they’re oat cookies with random stuff in them.  Cookies all the time?  Doesn’t that ruin cookies for everyone?  Cookies are meant to be eaten in moderation.  Like, I only get Milanos when I go to Winco… and I don’t like to go to Winco.  So I go once in awhile (a very long while).  It’s full of icky people.  I only go if I need some sort of food at 3 am and there’s nothing else to do.  Also, Girl Scout cookies come once a year, since if they were always there, we wouldn’t want them.  So, cookies are for moderation.

So, if you want to eat cookies and lose weight *rolls eyes*, you can look at the sketchy website here.  If you want to try their program for two weeks, be prepared to shell out a measly $133.90.  Oh, and there’s free shipping.  Woo, free shipping after I spent $133 bucks on cookies.  Bah, I’ll stick with shopping at Safeway and choosing salads and such.  I could spend that $133 on smaller clothes from the Gap.


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